As promised, here is the final post in the three-part series, How to Break Out of a Victim Mentality.
Make sure you check out Part 1 and Part 2.
Disclosure – This post contains affiliate links and I will be compensated if you make a purchase after clicking on my links. Any compensation I receive does not affect the price you pay.
Let’s roll out some more tips for breaking out of a victim mentality.
Seek financial freedom
While this doesn’t apply to all situations, sometimes we can feel trapped by our finances.
If we feel trapped by money (or most likely a lack of it), it normally means we are drowning in debt or making bad investment and lifestyle choices.
If you are drowning in debt, you obviously need to start paying off that debt.
Equally important, you need to look at the destructive spending habits that got you in trouble in the first place. You will need to alter your spending habits if you want to change your financial future.
Perhaps your problem can be helped by having some spare cash available. While throwing money at a problem isn’t usually the answer, there are some instances where it may be beneficial.
Having a financial buffer or safety stash for when a problem arises, can help in some situations.
Related post – Are You Spending Money to Fill a Void in Your Life?
Adjust your attitude
You need to ditch the ‘poor me’ attitude.
The truth is sometimes we want to wallow. We want to curl up and shut out the world. I’ve certainly done this in the past, usually when a guy has stomped all over my heart.
In cases such as heartbreak, hiding and licking our wounds can be helpful. A short period of wallowing before we crawl out of our cocoon and dive back into the world again can be healing and therapeutic.
However, if you get stuck in wallowing and feeling like the whole world is against you, you could be headed for trouble, particularly if depression sets in. And yes, I have been there too. Not a good place to be.
Perhaps a good way to get back out into life is to help people less fortunate than you. Maybe a stint of volunteering and helping others could help get your mojo back and stop thinking ‘poor me’.
Related content to help adjust your attitude –
- Does it Feel Like Everyone is Moving Forward – Except You?
- How to Break the Habit of Self-Doubt and Build Real Confidence
- 12 Techniques to Stop Feeling Inferior
- Does Other People’s Success Make You Feel Bad About Yourself?
Stop being codependent
I’m a fan of the ‘Twilight’ books and movies. I’ve watched all of the movies and read the series.
What I don’t like about the story is how codependent the character Bella is.
I realize Bella is meant to be a teenager, which is the only reason I can tolerate her behavior. Even taking her age into consideration, she can get on my nerves. Maybe because she reminds me of how codependent and needy I was as a teenager with my first boyfriend – cringe.
If you think there are not any real Bella’s out in the world – think again. There are plenty of them and a lot of them aren’t teenagers. Albeit most of them live without the vampires and werewolves factor, instead substituting them for bad relationships based on neediness and the complete inability to be alone or stand on one’s own two feet.
If you cannot be independent and are constantly expecting people to save you or complete you – you need to have a long, hard look at why you are so internally unhappy.
You need to find a way to harness your own internal happiness, instead of always seeking validation and acceptance outside of yourself.
Related post – Stop Waiting for Acceptance – Accept Yourself
Focus on what is important to you
Now is the time to focus on what you want.
If you have a project or goal that you want to achieve, now could be the time to get started. Granted, you might not have the time or energy to get 100% involved in your project, but at the very least you can start to research or do some preliminary work to get your project off the ground.
The key is to focus on what you want to achieve and not on your problems.
Who knows, you could be so busy working towards what you want, that your problem doesn’t seem quite so overwhelming.
Don’t expect the magic fairies to come and fix things for you
There are no magic fairies that are going to swoop in and save the day. Just like your chances of winning the lottery are extremely low.
While a bit of harmless fantasizing about things miraculously being fixed for you is normal, having an unrealistic view of the situation won’t do you any good. If you are waiting for someone or something to save you, you could be in for a big disappointment.
Be your own hero! Save yourself!
Related post – 6 Life-Changing Steps to Becoming the Person You Want to Be
Don’t give up
Above all, you have to stay strong.
Make up a list of your strengths to remind yourself of them. Be determined that your current adversity will not define you into the future. Make up a list of problems that you have already overcome.
Give yourself credit for being strong and resilient.
Make up a list of your joys and blessings. It is important to be grateful for the wonderful things we do have in our lives.
Stay strong, keep moving forward and the light will appear at the end of the tunnel and once again you will be shining brightly.
If you found value in this three-part series on how to break out of a victim mentality, please share the love via the social media buttons below.
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Great post!
Could you start a separate discussion on why Bella the Twilight girl is the Worst. Heroine. Ever???
Seriously what does she do besides sit around mooning over these boys??
Hi Kate
Thanks so much for stopping by. Apologies for the delay in writing back.
I totally agree with you Bella from Twilight is an incredibly bad version of a heroine. I could go to town writing that post!
Cheers
Thea
If Bella is the future for women in fiction, I may have to stick to male protagonists exclusively. Pray it isn’t so!
Hi David
Thank you so much for your comments. Lovely to see you here. I’m praying along with you on that one! I am confident there are a lot of wonderful, strong female characters in fiction still to come.
Cheers
Thea
Thank you for sharing your wisdom in this three-part post. Well worth the time to read, well worth the time to look internally and see where I can get out of my victim mentality. =)
Hi Melissa
It’s wonderful to see you here, thank you so much for your insightful comments. I am glad you enjoyed the victim mentality series. Originally I think I was only planning one post on the topic but once I got thinking about it – it turned into a series. I sometimes have to remind myself of my own advice when I hit a rough patch.
Again lovely to see you here and I look forward to chatting again soon.
Cheers
Thea
PS I am off to reply to your other great comments so you will be hearing from me again very soon! 🙂