Dealing with criticism is rarely fun but it's an essential part of life and personal growth.

We all need to find a way to deal with criticism. Whether we like it or not, criticism is a part of life.

No matter what we do, there will always be someone who doesn’t approve or agree with what we are doing or trying to create. There will always be someone who is more than happy to criticise us.

Unfortunately, the Internet is a breeding ground for criticism. People will say a lot more and be a lot meaner when they can be anonymous.

While all of us need to be able to handle criticism, if you are in a creative field, you will have to deal with more criticism and rejection than normal.

While rejection is one thing, criticism is a whole different ball game.

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Here are my thoughts on how to deal with criticism.

Accept that you will be criticized

Not everyone is going to love everything you do or create. Understand and come to terms with that right from the start.

When I first started blogging (many, many moons ago), I heard a friend had criticized my blog. More to the point, she criticized my writing. In her opinion, it was not up to scratch.

You are going to make mistakes, especially when you are starting something new. No one likes making mistakes, but everyone makes them at some point – even the experts.

You will make mistakes, and rest assured, someone will point them out. That’s simply a part of being brave and putting yourself out there in life.

It certainly beats the alternative, being too scared to try or do anything.

Take it on board

When I first heard the criticism about my writing, I decided to take it on board and make a conscious effort to improve.

Though it wasn’t easy to hear, I did appreciate the feedback and understood it had merit. I immediately began to edit my work more thoroughly. I realized that when I first started, I was spending so much time trying to grasp the technical side of things that I did not focus as much as I should have on things like grammar and punctuation.

While it may be easy to get defensive about your work (and don’t be surprised if this is your initial reaction), once that passes, it is time to take a step back, put your ego and pride aside, and examine whether there is a valid reason for the criticism.

Take negative feedback and turn it into something positive. Use negative feedback to your advantage.

In reality, you don’t want every single person saying how wonderful everything you do is. If everyone is always telling you how great your work is (particularly in a false, flattering type of way), how are you meant to uncover the areas where you can improve and grow?

Accept that not everyone is going to be a fan

We all know that not everyone is going to be a fan.

What may come as a surprise is when the criticism is coming from inside your team of supporters. Criticism coming from a stranger can be easier to swallow – criticism from our close friends or family can sting a little (or a lot, depending on what the criticism is).

Don’t assume those closest to you will appreciate or like your work. Remember the old saying –  you can’t please everyone – so best not exhaust yourself trying.

As unpleasant as it may seem, we have to understand that we can’t control how people talk about us. We simply have to come to terms with the fact that they will.

Examine the motive behind the criticism

I would take on board any constructive criticism from my manager at work, or an editor if it were a writing situation.

Yet whether we like it or not, some people simply like to criticize.

Some people say everything was great – but. There is always a but. They have to find some sort of fault in everything, no matter how great it was.

Others just love to criticize people. They like to bring them down a peg or two. Another reason people criticise is that they want to manipulate you. They want something from you and need you to feel a certain emotion to get what they want. Think along the lines of someone trying to make you feel guilty, angry, jealous, or insecure.

In some cases, when people are criticising you, you need to think about what their motive is. What’s in it for them? What are they hoping to achieve by criticising you?

Related post – How to Stop Criticizing Others

Consider the source

When it comes to criticism, it is important to consider the source. Criticism from family can be particularly hard to deal with. Criticism from our parents, even more so.

If you are struggling with excessive and constant criticism from your parents, this book may help. 

If a complete stranger criticises you, you might think nothing of it, because you are not invested in that person. The relationship you have with the person who criticizes you plays a big part in how you feel.

Try not to take it personally

I know this one is hard. It can be hard not to take criticism personally, because it can feel very personal indeed.

If you are going to take it personally, try not to get bogged down in it.

Think as logically as possible as to whether the criticism is warranted, and then take steps to work on the problem area. Once you have done that, move on. Do not dwell on the negative.

Of course, the criticism may not be warranted at all, which means you need to do your best to let it go and not let it bother you.

Prove them wrong

This one is by far my favorite. Prove people wrong. Work hard, constantly improve yourself, and succeed.

Nothing trumps criticism like success, accomplishment, and being happy.

How to deal with criticism

No one likes being criticised. Criticism can feel very hurtful at times. It can make us doubt ourselves.  

We must learn how to process and deal with criticism. We mustn’t let criticism affect our self-confidence or self-worth. Each of us is far too important for that. 

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Read Next – 12 Things To Remember When You Think You’re Not Good Enough