In my last post I stated that in the New Year my new posting schedule would be Monday and Thursday.
As it turns out on the first Thursday of the year, I had to take my baby boy (who I have written about before on the blog) to the vet after work. It was distressing for the both of us.
During the day, I kept telling myself that I would publish a post when I got home from the vet. Considering there was no post on Thursday, I think we all know how that turned out.
In essence I had been lying to myself.
Deep down even as I said the words to myself – I knew they were a lie.
With a post still to write, I turned my attention to Friday evening. It was a simple enough plan – go grocery shopping, come home after work and publish the post. I might even have a relaxing glass of wine first – how much harm could that do?
Clearly my willpower had deserted me to even be thinking about a glass of wine.
An interesting thing happened as I turned on the computer, checked my blog stats and had a quick look at my Write Change Grow Facebook page – I was honest with myself.
I admitted to myself that I wasn’t going to write the post tonight. I knew it wasn’t going to get done and I stopped lying to myself about it.
Have an honest think about this one. How often do you lie to yourself?
Look at just a few of the basic lies we tell ourselves.
- I will stop smoking.
- I will start eating healthier
- I will start exercising more
- I will get out of a bad relationship
- I will work less
- I will spend more time with family
- I will spend more time writing and creating (yes that one came specifically from me)
One good way to tell if you are lying to yourself is by checking yourself for an excuse. Often without realizing, we will already have our excuse lined up and ready to go for why we didn’t deliver.
You can imagine how endless our excuses list can be. When we are good at lying to ourselves – we also become an expert in excuses.
The odd thing about lying is that many of us can easily spot when someone else is lying but are completely oblivious to when we are lying to ourselves.
So how do we stop lying to ourselves?
We need to start with awareness. We can’t actively stop a behavior if we are not aware of what we are doing in the first place.
Admit when you are lying to yourself.
Challenge yourself for a week. Listen to your thoughts and words and really start pulling yourself up on them. Understand the difference between when you are lying to yourself and when life genuinely gets in the way.
I knew waking up this morning, I was going to get this post done today.
I knew this time – it wasn’t a lie.
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