Have you ever looked at the people around you and wondered why their lives are moving forward (falling in love, getting married, having children, getting wonderful jobs, making a lot of money, having a great social life) and yet your life seems to be standing still or worse going backwards?
Have you ever thought, when the hell is it going to be my turn?
If you are a regular reader of this blog, you will know that I am trying to change my life. More to the point, I am trying to change careers, which has had a huge impact on my life.
Due to the sacrifices I have made to get to this point, my lifestyle is very different from what it was a couple of years ago. Most days, I am more than happy with that, but hey I’m human, there are the odd times I struggle with it. I occasionally feel that everyone is moving ahead in leaps and bounds and I am standing still.
If you ever feel this way, here are some thoughts to keep in mind.
Run Your Own Race
I mentioned this in an earlier post about comparing yourself to others. We live in a competitive world. No one would dispute that.
Yet the truth is you are ultimately running your own race. The person you are competing against most of the time is yourself. I can’t help thinking we have an internal competition/tug of war going with the person we are right now and the person we want to be (or know we can be).
You need to be patient
Sometimes we simply need time on our side. We need patience. If you watch some advertising (or a romantic comedy for that matter), you could be under the impression that wonderful, life changing events happen in an instant. Of course, this can often be the case. But most likely, the good stuff takes a little longer. Hang in there and be patient.
Have a plan and take action
So your life isn’t moving along the way you want it to. How exactly do you want it to move along?
Do you have a plan of attack to achieve what you want? Are you working every day towards making that plan a reality or are you hoping your heart’s desire simply manifests itself out of thin air without any effort on your part?
Many of the great things in life just don’t fall into our laps. They take work and courage. If you are simply sitting around waiting for your great life to fall into place, you might be waiting a long time.
Step up and make good things happen. Be an active leader in the direction of your life.
Accept you may be on a different path
Okay some of you might not like this one. Perhaps your life will be different – perhaps you are on a different path.
I will give you an example. You might be rushing to walk down the aisle and be like all of your married friends. I hate to break the news to you but not everyone gets married. Not everyone has children, not everyone meets their soul mate. I am not trying to bust anyone’s bubble here but sometimes these big ticket items that society seems to think should happen to everyone – just don’t.
The point is to realise that going down another path is okay. You simply might be destined for other amazing, fabulous things in life. Life doesn’t (and probably shouldn’t) be about everyone following a set life template. After all, what we want in life is not a one size fits all proposition.
Your turn may ultimately come, but it may not be in the form you expected.
Life can look different from the outside
This one might seem a bit negative – but it is something to consider if you are secretly coveting someone else’s life.
Everyone has their own problems to deal with. It is easy to forget that when we are looking in from the outside. We only see one dimension of a relationship or situation.
I will give you an extreme example. When I was growing up, my parents were friends with another married couple that had 3 children. As a youngster, I thought they were the perfect family. I wanted my dysfunctional family to be more like them.
It wasn’t till years later, when the husband left the wife for her best friend that I got to hear a small part of what went on in their family home. It was not pretty. Actually, it was downright ugly. As an adult, I was shocked to find out what was going on within my ‘perfect family’. That realisation opened my eyes up to what can be going on in the shadows.
Everyone has their own problems to deal with.
It’s about being happy with where you are right now
I am going through an interesting stage of my life at the moment. It is a bit like a roller coaster ride to be honest. Some days are wonderful. Some feel like I am going backwards. I have to cope with down days (and to be honest there have been a few of those lately).
Despite all of this, the truth is, I am incredibly happy. I am doing something that is really important to me. Something I have wanted my whole life. At the moment, I might not be progressing at the exact speed I would like but I am certainly moving in the right direction.
What are your thoughts on how your life is progressing? Do you ever feel you are being left behind? Please join the conversation and leave your comments below.